Glee is an amazing fabulous effervescent show and I can’t help but feel that my Tuesday revolves around Glee. It comes on at 8, and I make sure my homework is complete, my chores are done, my dinner is eaten, my computer logged off. I sit down and watch the tail end of American Idol every week and wait wait wait the two minutes before my DVR records the musical epiphany that is GLEE! I know, it’s unhealthy to love something so frivolous but consider it my vice. You can be a social smoker and I can be a social gleek. I love it very much- the songs, the voices, the drama, the characters, and SUE SYLVESTER. Plus the male characters are lovely to look at and to listen too. Ahhh. GLEE. GLEE. GLEE. GLEE. Ily. Glee!
I am pretty sorry to see my friends go but right now as i sit not worrying about homework or studying or tests or friends or grades, I am in a fantabulous mood. It’s been a pretty amazing year for me, and I don’t have a lot of regrets. I just feel like everything has happened so fast- one year closer to adulthood, one year closer to college and work and spouses and LIFE. Oh my gosh life is totally going by way too fast.
Formspring hurts. For those who don’t know, it’s a site that allows others to ask questions (anonymous questioning is an option). I created an account some months ago and promptly forgot about it. I looked at it today and saw over 100 questions- approximately 70 of them were anonymous, hateful questions that harassed me sexually, or discriminated, or just pure hated on me. I was so depressed by the time i finished reading through them- i just deleted my account and cried. Why do we ask about cyber bullying and it’s prominence in society? WE ARE ENABLERS. When you give a druggie money you are enabling. Formspring is an enabler to the petty insecure teenagers of america. And it hurts. And even I, a relatively strong person, cried. It hurts reading derogatory remarks over and over again. The words change but the hate is constant.
I’m so excited to see the school year over, but I’m also so sad to lose friends- it doesn’t matter how much you promise to stay in touch, you lose friends. The way you lose hair, you lose weight. It’s easy to gain, easy to lose, hard to regain. How do you look forward to that?
So my very close friend’s mother just passed three hours ago and I found out via facebook (I understand, media and technology replacing human contact and whatnot). I never met the woman (She lived in Jordan) but somehow i feel this sense of intense loss. It’s really vague, like five minutes after you hit your funny bone. It’s kind of a hollow sense- you can’t feel it but you knew that until recently it was there. I guess what I’m saying is that I miss my friend’s elderly mother from Amman. I don’t know why. and I hate that it’s 1 am and it isn’t acceptable for me to go over and cry because I miss this woman I’ve never met. My friend just lost her rock and I miss a hypothetical figure in my life. I wonder why? I don’t know if I’m incredibly selfish or just incredibly bizarre. (or both) All I know for sure right now is that I need to get off my lazy butt and make something warm for my friend so that I can go over tomorrow at 2 PM and offer to watch her 4 kids and let her grieve in peace. May that dear woman’s soul rest in peace. Insh’Allah.
Looking forward to my first ever dance class- well the first one since ballet in the first grade. Hope I can learn grace and beauty and whatnot. It’ll at least be an experience to talk about in years to come. Later I’m gonna see Iron Man 2- oh yeah- it’s the life tomorrow.
Life is pretty high up in the sky today. It’s 1:12 in the morning, it’s calm, it’s serene, it’s silent. I love it. All I can hear is the sad sound of now-canceled Scrubs. (RIP Zach braff). Anyways I really don’t have a specific reason for a blog, i’m no budding fashion designer with an eye for color. I’m just a sometimes overwhelmed under appreciated person like everyone else on the computer past 11 pm. Actually I somewhat enjoy late night computer time. I can do whatever I want, as in go look up the season premier of Wizards of Waverly Place without feeling embarrassed. I can properly stalk that one girl I hate on Facebook. Anything’s possible with Night Time Internet. Where The Wild Things Are. It’s a peaceful realm, no chat boxes popping up saying “Did you get the answer for number five on the biology homework?!?” The internet is freeing, like I can do whatever I want (within reason) and in the privacy of my own room. I can wear a ballgown or a bikini, whatever I desire. I can have conversations with complete strangers as I fold my laundry. Either way I guess this first ever entry is dedicated to… (Da da da daaa!) The Internet! ILY!